Samsung Eternity Review.

Let me explain something to you. A cell phone is very, very important to me. I text a lot. I make a lot of calls. You can only imagine how critical of a cellphone I can be. So last Christmas i got this Samsung Eternity. You've probably seen it. The revolutionary, touch screen, I-Phone killer. Surely this huge leap in cellular design will wow its users, right? Wrong. Oh so wrong. I'll pick this bitch apart piece by piece.

First of all the appearance. Oh wow, shiny. What a pretty touch screen! I hope you like crap, because this "shiny" touch screen will remain unscratched for almost 30 minutes. After having the phone for 9 months the screen looks like it was thrown into a blender, or rubbed up against a sandpaper sheet for ten straight hours.

Moving right along, the texting. For the love of God, can anything be this bad. Look, it was a nice try. When the phone is held upright its a regular cellphone keyboard, but when turned sideways it becomes a computer style QWERTY keyboard. Well have I mentioned that the keys are literally 2 cms by 2 cms and they're right up against each other. If I just continued to type a rational thought without stopping to correct mistakes it would look like this: "Het wiou;d yop likrt to graf sope Taco Bel;?" I know what you're thinking. Well, Kameron, just use T9! Listen here you smartass. I'll use T9 when AT&T hires someone whose not Asian or four years old to arrange the in phone dictionary. Here's a short list of words T9 made up: Yoi, An't, Ommorrow, and of course esterday.

Last but not least the extras. There's literally one game on this bad boy, and i hope you like dice. Because thats it. Just a pair of dice that roll. No rules. No score. Just dice.

Welp that just about wraps it up. If you hate texting, logic, and the English language, but you love dice, this phone is for you. Otherwise, get something else. Congratulations Eternity, you suck.